Sunday, June 1, 2008

Twisted all around

There's been a great deal of changes in my life over the past few weeks.  

First, I graduated.  There's no more tests, no more registering for classes, and no more artificial "academic" environment (at least not until I start grad school).  It's the end of a period in my life, and one that I expected.  I have prepared for this change, and it does not bother me.

Second, I've begun a new relationship.  Unlike graduation, this change was something that I did not anticipate.  It is, however, one that is a pleasant surprise.  This relationship is precipitating many others--I have to get used to being happy, opening my life to someone else, and work hard to place myself in someone else's life.  (Altogether, this is easier than I thought it would be.)

Finally, I've moved back home.  This is a change that has the outward appearance of pushing me backwards instead of encouraging growth.  That may or may not end up being true.  At the moment, fiscally, it's the most responsible choice.  In addition, I'm coming to realize that I need the support of my family more than I like to admit sometimes, and I'm going to enjoy having that close.  I left home for the first time when I was 16 years old and I haven't really been back since.  As much stress as this will inevitably cause on my part (and the part of my parents and sister), these next months are the last that we will ever spend under the same roof.  It will be a change for all of us, and only time will tell if Schroedinger's cat lives to see another sardine.

There are more changes in my future.  Some I have control over, and others will happen without my input.  The mark of an adult is not being in complete control of your life--it is being able to adapt to change with grace and dignity, and to find joy in all circumstances.  Change is inevitable, as is choice.  And it is my choice to make the next phase of my life a happy and productive one.